America is Sick & So Am I

Every two months, they put me on a new medicine. Every two months, my body freaks out, adjusts, attempts to align. Every two months, for the past year and a half, I get a blood test that tells me the same news: Nope, not healthy yet. Not normal yet. This is not over yet. Try again. And again. And again.

Every few months, there’s a new name in the news. Every few months, we go through this process: shock, outrage, he-said-she-said, a call for justice, an attempt at justice. Every few months, we see another man “fall” (is that what happens, when they get multi-million dollar early retirement plans?). Every few months, we have to live through shocking headlines, heartbreaking stories. Every few months, women across the country are re-traumatized for the hope of half a step of progress forward. And again. And again. And again.

I’m tired and once again not sleeping and it’s been so dang long of on-and-off insomnia. I’m tired and there’s nothing I can do about it. Nothing I can do to make it stop. Just hoping the next cycle brings healing. Just hoping the next cycle brings change.

We’re tired and we’re exhausted and we don’t know what else to do. We’ve voted and we marched and yet still this? Still no change? We’ve done all we can do – and it makes you wonder if we can do anything at all. Can we ever stop this? Can we change anything? Read More

I can’t help but wonder…

I can’t help but wonder… why are we talking about bathrooms again? Why, exactly, do we care where people pee??

I can’t help but wonder if these are the same excuses once used for segregated bathrooms. If this is the same process we had to go through to remember that black people are, in fact, humans, too. If these are age old lessons that we will have to continue re-teaching people. If we realize we’re going to be on the wrong side of history. Read More

I’m Mad

I’m mad because last month we were so worried about bathrooms. Bathrooms.

I’m mad because NOW people care about rape culture – when a very white, very privileged, very athletically gifted person made headlines for something that goes on everyday in this country. Only after a very educated, very well-articulated victim was given a platform, do we stop and listen.

I’m mad because NOW people care about the LGBT community – only after a massacre. Only after a senseless act of violence so horrible that we can’t even fathom it; we can only grieve it.

I’m mad because NOW people care – while it’s in the spotlight, while there’s a hashtag, while it’s still news. But we won’t care next week or next month. We won’t care enough to actually change anything; we won’t care when there’s hard work involved. We won’t really care until its our brother or our sister or our child or our neighbor – we won’t really care until its too late. Read More

Used to It

A week ago, my pipes weren’t working. Now, when I step into the shower I am overcome with gratefulness for a shower that drains, for the ability to wash my hair whenever I want to. Rinsing off after the gym tonight, I was once again so happy to have working plumbing… yet I wondered at what point I’d start taking it for granted again. It’s a week out. Maybe in two? Maybe three? Definitely by a month, I won’t even think twice about water whooshing down my drain. After all, that’s what it’s supposed to do. No big deal. I’ll be used to it.

It reminded me of when I was coming back from Malawi, how I was so convinced I wasn’t going to take anything for granted. Electricity that works all the time? What a gift. My friends in the same city, in the same time zone? I’ll be forever in awe. Mexican food?! I will praise Jesus for every burrito. And yet, with time, everything became normal once again.  No big deal. I was used to it. (Okay…. I might still do the last one. Burritos are heaven sent.)

It then reminded me of an article I read recently on porn. Shower… Malawi…. porn. Natural progression of thoughts, right? Read More

Red My Lips – Why?

Last year April, I explained how I think wearing red lipstick can change the world (kinda, sorta). About this wonderful non-profit Red My Lips and their wonderful message. So I don’t need to tell you again. This year, let me tell you why I’m wearing red lipstick.

I’m doing this for my friend who was groped by a family member as a little girl.
For my other friend who was sexually abused by a friend of the family as a little boy.
I’m doing this for my friend who’s teacher took advantage of her in high school.
For my other friend who’s high school boyfriend didn’t stop when she asked him to.
I’m doing this for my friend who was raped in college.
For my other friend who was gang raped in college.
For so many friends, that there’s really too many too list.
I’m doing this for all of you who are reading this and thinking, “Wow – me, too. My friends, too.” I’m especially doing this for all of you reading this and thinking, “Wow – you know so many. What are the odds? How do you know so many and I don’t?” Here’s the problem: you do. Read More

Why Can’t We #FreeKesha?

If you know me, you know I have an unexplainable obsession with Kesha. If you don’t know me – hi, I’m Krysti. I eat too much ice cream and I’m obsessed with Kesha. (Real talk: I think those are the only two things some students in our youth group know about me…)

We don’t need to get into the origins of my obsession (who knows, really?) or the amount of times I’ve dressed up as Kesha (three), or even all my reasons for loving her (too many to list, C’MON). But we do need to be talking about a big issue here: Kesha just lost a law suit claiming abuse and rape, and is now stuck in a legal contract to keep producing music with her alleged attacker.

***I say claimed and I say alleged, because we don’t know what happened. I’m not pretending to know the truth here, neither should you. That’s the problem with cases of abuse – it’s largely he said / she said. It’s a lot of conjecture. It’s a lot of no hard evidence. Which means there’s a lot of cases of our legal system being, sadly, useless *** Read More

Dressember 9: I’m Not a Fan of “Feminism”

For the month of December – in honor of Dressember – I’ll be blogging everyday! Thoughts on anything from fighting for justice to feminism, from dresses I’m wearing to books I’m reading, and everything in between. 

Last week I wrote about feminism, about how it get’s a bad rep, but it really, truly – at its heart – is simply equality.  It was really cool seeing the feedback I got from people – who were glad to see me reclaim the word for good, excited that I was speaking out to the haters, encouraged that I see feminism as a two way street between men and women.

I admitted that there are some crazies out there (like within every belief). One bad apple spoils the bunch, right? Whenever I tell people I’m a feminist, I have to quickly explain, “but I’m not one of those, like, femi-nazis!” So I thought it might do some good to explain some “feminist” movements that I don’t support, or I believe miss the mark: Read More